What then?

My brother just turned 17 yesterday. Yesterday was his 40th day at the same time. Cool huh? Love you much kuya *kiss*

It's just weird to know, that after I convinced myself that this is how it's going to be, here you are, trying to tell me something. After realizing . . . . . . . . . and after feeling strange about these feelings for you . . . . . . you tell me something that will linger inside my head. I thought of you almost everyday. But after that one night. . . . . . . wala lang. I realized something. So eto, okay na sa akin yun. Then all of a sudden. . . . . .garr. Diba? Isn't it just confusing? When you don't know where to place yourself? Bahala na si batman. Sa akin lang, it's the friendship I don't want to risk. That's that. Hahaha.

. . . and I miss kuya.

I got the sincere sorry I was waiting for, thanks :)

Thank you Ms. Malayas. I felt great after I shared my realizations about life and death. The fact that I was able to let other people witness how God greatly worked in our lives was fulfilling. Although, when I had to share how much it hurts to lose a brother, it was again heart-breaking. Imagine. 4 na beses ko shnare, in short, sa whole batch, tapos akala ko naiyak ko na lahat, but no, I just can't help but cry. Anyway, at least nalalabas ko yung mga di ko maiyak sa bahay. I have to put up the cheerful smile so that my parents, especially my mom, won't be feeling sad again. So. . It's hard to talk to the walls you know? It's really hard when you have no one to vent out your feelings.

I'm off to Holiday Inn with my cousins tomorrow. Rarrr.

*Sayonara*

Better

I am feeling much much better now.

Kinikilig ako. . . . why? B---A---S---T---A. Hey, it's not what you think. HAH.

I'm starting to enjoy our CL class.

--HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAAAAAAAAAXIIINE! Love you muchy muchy :D
*Sayonara*

?

Tama friends ko, akala ko matalino ka? Honestly, I actually liked your personality even though some of my friends didn't. I just like how you carry yourself very well. But I guess you were too confident, that you don't even care if you hurt somebody's feelings. I'm now one of the few people who got hurt with all that shit you had to say.

Lahat na sabihin mo, lahat na bigyan mo ng comment. . . but for crying out loud, not to those people you don't even know and you're not even sure what is the whole story behind it. I tell you, if you continue doing that, you might get into trouble. So if I were you, I'd just keep my mouth shut. I need not elaborate the things you said there. I totally respect your opinion kahit nakakasakit. What can I do? Ganyan ka eh. I already made a comment and I guess that's it. Of course, I can't just sit here and let this pass by without doing at least something. Please lang, konting respeto dahil hindi ka naman namatayan. Worst, hindi ka pa nawawalan ng super close na kapatid. Got that? I hope so.

Thanks to all my concerned friends :) Salamat :) I'll pray for her.

*Sayonara*

Maybe I'm crazy, but laughing out loud makes the pain pass by

No one seems to understand what I'm going through. Sadly, I think no one will.

I woke up so darn early to go to mass at 7:30am. Woopie. Sorry =/ It's just my whole body hurts and I can barely stand up this morning. Btw, we had our physical fitness test yesterday morning. Gaah. Now, I just realized that my body's not used to working out anymore. WHAAT?

Oh. . . and did I tell you what event I joined in for our intrams? Hah. Don't ask. But hey, I'm good at it. Seriously ;) I will let you know. . . maybe soon. HAHA. Surprisingly, I did not join rhythmic. Woaah. But a part of me felt envious. I mean, I love to dance. It's just this time, I have to stay focus. I'm really determined to make a difference this school year and I am inspired by my brother.

Unfortunately, I was not able to attend an activity in YFC, again. We had to go to my cousin Carl's birthday party. Happy Yey baby Carl!

*Sayonara*

Lost

I'm totally lost. You see, I actually deleted my posts for no good reason at all. I just felt like deleting it. Maybe I just got bored with it already. Hah.

Oh well. Trixie, Tiffany and I went to check on the library of UP this afternoon. We went there only to find out that they're only open for outsiders every wednesday. Darn that. So much for trying.

I won't be posting entries as often like before. Busy? I mean now? Not really. I just want to keep myself busy with shitloads of school work.

When it hurts so much what can I do? when everything is wrong what should I do? and when someone is fake what should I think?

**Nothing could make my day alright.

I'm off to have dinner with the Villamayor family.

---friends, just read on.

*Sayonara*